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Chastity is a gift that you are giving to him and not a punishment, treat it as such and ensure that it makes your life easier and more fulfilling.

Just let that sink in for a moment and consider how that changes your outlook on how to keep him motivated. The other side of the coin is the rewards that you can expect to receive for yourself.

This spills over into other parts of my life and frankly, things just seem to get easier as time goes on. Remember that you should not allow bargaining, this reduces your authority and increases his power.

If you say that he should do something, that is what he should do. If he tries to bargain with you, take privileges away or use a punishment of some kind until the bargaining stops.

You want to use positive motivation with this aspect of your relationship, I cover spanking and other punishments elsewhere on the site but those should be reserved for outright defiance, lies or broken promise.

You can allow him to go without the cage as a reward but if you do this, you must be careful to not make it seem like the cage is a punishment.

Keeping him locked and properly motivated works best with positive reinforcement. Reward him with things that you can both enjoy while he is locked.

Need daily oral sex? Want to peg him? Want massages? All of these things and more can be yours with the magic of chastity.

I proudly wear his key around my neck because I am in awe of the changes that this one simple change has made in all aspects of our relationship.

If you know someone struggling with their chastity journey, share this article using the share link on the right side. Above all, have fun with it!

In turn, I will point you back to this blog. Once again Emma you nailed it. Great post! Once we found a happy medium between the two the rest of the dynamic just fell into place.

I did find that when we reached a new lockup goal she would express how proud of me she was. Hearing those simple words was and still is a big motivator for me.

My husband found chastity extremely difficult to get used to. His emotions used to begin with polite requests for release, burning resentment, whining to angry outbursts.

I was steadfast and firm that he would remain locked till I decide and the date and time is entirely at my discretion and with no prior notice to him.

His mood swings would culminate in crying and begging me on his knees. I used to then cuddle and caress him allowing him to nurse at my breasts telling him that he must learn to live locked till I decide other wise.

Over time he has learnt that no matter how and what he says or does , I decide. He knows that I love him, and keep him aroused and excited but his pleasure and desire should be focussed upon me.

I am pleased to report that now he has almost its never hundred percent! He does know that I will always comfort him and often begs me to allow him nurse at my breasts when he is overwhelmed and close to tears.

I can now release, tease and lock him up without allowing him to come and there is no protest. He has also learnt to eat his cum, often licking it off my feet or fed by my hands.

We are a happy couple, who share chores and there is element of bdsm in our life. However when it comes to our sexual life, I call the shots.

My husband is always kept aroused and anticipating his next release not knowing the frequency, place, time and occasion.

It keeps him focussed and alert upon me. Just want to share with readers that we can control our men, without corporal punishment or slavery.

However firm resolve is a MUST. A wife must also know how to comfort her man when he is near breaking point. Love Asha. Wonderful comment and insight Asha!

This will only get more mainstream when more people see that male chastity can stand on its own without corporal punishment or kink, and truly fulfill both sides in a marriage.

I am sure it is great with those aspects as well, but is certainly not required. This is a journey for both men and women and your man is lucky to have a women with your resolve, perseverance, and nurturing nature.

I could not be happier with my loving wife managing my release and helping me to be the best I can be. If the journey was not a challenge it would not be worth doing.

Great post, great comments, and spot on by everyone. It is the teasing and attention that keeps him motivated to please her.

And that brings many tangential rewards to both. Of course, despite my desire to release, what I really want is her to say no…making love, or being teased, and then locked up without a release is sure to keep me focused on her — and making sure she has plenty of orgasmic pleasures.

And the tenderness, closeness, etc is far greater. And the never knowing when…amazing. Fortunately, I can get back into the right mindset after only a day or two.

Hi there i hope you dont mind me asking since you are a lady and can give me even a greater perspective on women.

Hello, Emma I wanted to thank you for your insightful, real-world, take on male chastity. I stumbled across The Dark Side of Chastity quite by accident.

I had typed in chastity painful frustration and denial captions looking to get my angst fix! I am an admitted angst junkie.

I like captioned images, and the nastier the better! It caught my eye, so I read the teaser and had to read the rest of your article.

I should give you a little background so you understand why this article was important to my wife and I. I have been married to my wonderful wife for 32 years.

We have always been sexually adventurous and very open and honest about our needs and desires. I worship the ground she walks on and have always wanted to please her regardless if there is anything in it for me or not.

I get such a high from giving her earth-shattering orgasms I never feel deprived. Even in the early days of our love affair, there was generally a 3 to 1 orgasm ratio, or more!

We have indulged in role-playing since we started dating and have been watching porn together since the hardcore heydays of VHS.

With the introduction of the double-edged sword that is the internet, we started finding many new things that excited us and incorporating them into our role-play.

Note; for those who are wondering, my wife had led a very promiscuous life before met. About three years ago, I suggested trying a chastity cage.

But she has a degree in psychology with a minor in human sexuality, and to her credit can be a very convincing Dominatrix when she is in the mood! But when it came to using the chastity cage, despite my attempts to explain it, she never really understood my fascination with being locked.

She would have me wear the cage during our role-play sessions when it was appropriate, but would never keep me locked more than three days, sighting her need for cock!

As I write this comment, locked, it has been eight days since my wife read your article. Obviously, they decided that my site was no longer acceptable and they set up specific rules so that tumbex users no longer have access to the contents of tumblr.

It's unfortunate, I loved tumblr, that's why I created tumbex. Using tumblr with an easy, clean and efficient interface was my goal.

Because to be honest, their interface is really to be reviewed otherwise you would not be here. It is therefore with great sadness that I announce that you are living the last moments of tumbex, it was a great adventure, and a big thank you to all those who have followed me during all this time!

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Tease And Denial Captions Video

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